Live, Love, Burn, Die.

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 04:26:01 GMT

I feel good about the future,
this clarity I've never had.
You are the bounce in my step,
the burst of blood in my chest,
the prayer I've kept in my head.

You are the knock of my knees,
the heavy sound of each heart beat.
You are the words I fumble for.

In the morning,
you are the daybreak,
and I am glad.

And at night,
you are the dream
I fall asleep to have.

------------

Once in a lifetime, you look in someone's eyes, and it feels like the world stops turning at once.
That's what it felt like for me, I knew right away we would stand together, believing that forever is in our reach.

With love as my witness, I swear I'll be with you till the end. Nothing can tear this love apart. I'll put my hand upon my heart; This is the promise I'll make to you:

Whatever comes we'll see it through
Nothing can break it
This feeling's too strong
With love as my witness,
I promise to love you.

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 16:36:47 GMT

it was funny at first but now it's getting old, the way you seem to reappear when I start moving on. well, I heard you were at some parties, getting high with my friends. hey, baby, it's kinda funny you started smoking weed again. nowadays i get up, i don't do half the stupid things I did behind your back. in fact, since you have been away, i've had no use for that. But i've come dangerously close to giving it all up. you know, you weren't the only one I didn't pretend to love. do you remember when you were away at school and i was still living with my mom? do you remember the things we'd say to each other over the phone? one night you were so drunk that you said you could be with me forever and thats when i said, "my dear, that'd be my pleasure."

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 05:54:02 GMT

I can't get over you, can't get through to you;
My feelings for you are forever.

Wed, 12 Aug 2009 05:51:49 GMT

as the years go by i race the clock with you
but if you died right now, know that i'd die too
you remind me of the times when i knew who i was
still the second hand will catch us, like it always does
we'll make the same mistakes, i'll take the fall for you
i hope you need this now cause i know i still do

Mon, 27 Jul 2009 23:16:00 GMT

but compared to your eyes

nothing shines quite as bright

Tue, 21 Jul 2009 21:36:41 GMT

But I can't help feeling like

We just might get it right this time

I could be your everything if you let me

Tue, 21 Jul 2009 04:29:23 GMT

Sometimes late at night I think about all the things that have been, all the things that haven’t been and all the things yet to be. If my heart could explode into a billion tiny pieces and scatter themselves all over the world. If I could live on sunlight and the city sounds and fall asleep in those thousands of lighted windows. I wonder if this world will ever make sense to me… and if there’s really anything to make sense of after all.

it might not make sense now but,
sometimes in order to not fall apart,
you have to let go of what keeps you together.

And I don’t understand why I sleep all day,
and I start to complain when there is no rain.
I don’t believe in miracles,
but I believe in you.

All that I'm after is a life full of laughter,
As long as I'm laughing with you.

The greatest irony of love; loving the right person at the wrong time, having the wrong person when the time is right and finding out you love someone right after that person walks out of your life. And sometimes, you think you're already over a person, but when you see them smile at you, you'll suddenly realize that you're just pretending to be over them just to ease the pain of knowing that they will never be yours again. For some, they think that letting go is one way of expressing how much they love that person. Some are afraid to see the one they love being held by someone else. Most relationships tend to fail not because the absence of love. Love is always present. It's just that one was being loved too much and the other was being love too little. As we all know that the heart is the center of the body but it beats on the left. Maybe that's the reason why the heart is not always right. Most often we fall in love with the person we think we love but to only discover that for them, we are just for passing time while the one who truly loves us remains either a friend or a stranger. So here's a piece of advice; let go when you're hurting too much, give up when love isn't enough, and move on when things are not like before. For sure there is someone out there who will love you even more.

Sometimes you have to give up on people. Everyone that is in your journey is meant to be in your journey, but not everyone is meant to stay there. Find someone who makes you better.

Sat, 11 Jul 2009 00:22:09 GMT

I GOT IN. FUCK YES. APPARENTLY NOT EVEN THE SHITTEST GRADES IN ALL THE LAND CAN KEEP ME FROM GETTING OUT IF THIS GOD FORSAKEN TOWN.

new life? here. i. come.

housing deposit went out today, so fucking excited.

Wed, 24 Jun 2009 04:31:24 GMT

she let it go
the hard feelings and the hardships
sail away for good
wave goodbye and wave hello
i'm standing at the shore
offering you more
than you could ever want

and i'm just as nervous as you are
i'm just a piece of glass
i'm just a subtle memory
that hasn't fully passed
and i'm strong but i'm weak
i'm hoping you will see
that sometimes you just have to fall apart
to be complete

Wed, 27 May 2009 02:38:08 GMT

Pockets full of money that I saved and never spent, a shoebox full of letters that I wrote and never sent, words of love and promises I thought but never said, hoping that I wouldn't fall behind, nights I wasted dreaming things that I forgot when I awoke, journeys I had plotted out, but I never found the road, running into strangers, never looking in their eyes, all the magic that we might have shared if not for my disguise and still, I'm grateful to be alive, and waiting for the moment to arrive. Seize the moment when it comes. Seize the moment - it may be the only one. Seize the moment - don't you let it pass you by. You've gotta seize the moments of your life. I tried to say I loved you but I was paralyzed. I wanted to find happiness but I lost it in your eyes. I waited far too many years before I realized I have wasted all the best years of my life just waiting for the moment to arrive.

Sun, 17 May 2009 22:36:23 GMT

we got nothing to lose but time

So stick your hand into my back pocket,

Light me up like a bottle rocket;

I just wanna free fall for a while.

Tonight is tellin' us we're way too young

But I've got forever on the tip of my tongue.
-- Wild at Heart; Gloriana

Thu, 07 May 2009 05:14:17 GMT

Do you realise that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about ageing that you think in fractions.

'How old are you?' 'I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

'How old are you?' 'I'm gonna be 16!' You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life ..... . You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony. YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80's and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30 ; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there Into the 90s, you start going backwards; 'I Was JUST 92.'

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. 'I'm 100 and a half!'
May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!

HOW TO STAY YOUNG

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay 'them'

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a shopping trip, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER :
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Tue, 05 May 2009 02:57:06 GMT

you are everything i want because your everything im not

A little small talk, a smile, and baby I was stuck.

I still don't know what you've done with me

A grown-up woman should never fall so easily

'Cause everything is new, yeah and everything is you

And all I've learned has overturned, what can I do?

Sat, 25 Apr 2009 23:24:38 GMT

God bless the daylight, the sugary smell of springtime.

..it was eighty eight today <3

Sat, 25 Apr 2009 06:38:56 GMT

"Remember the first time you went to a show and saw your favorite band? You wore their shirt, and sang every word. You knew nothing except that this music made you feel different from anyone you shared a locker with. Someone finally understood you. This is what music is about.”

Fri, 06 Mar 2009 22:24:55 GMT

01. the bucket x kings of leon.
02. the new pollution x beck.
03. daft punk is playing at my house x lcd soundsystem.
04. no biterz x miss tk & the revenge.
05. umbrella x marie digby.
06. float on x goldspot.
07. stereo x pavement.
08. hot 'n cold x katy perry.
09. mercy x duffy.
10. new shoes x paolo nutini.
11. ha ha x mates of state.
12. die alone x ingrid michaelson.
13. screaming infidelities x joanna.
14. into the dark x ben lee.
15. don't stop the beat x junior senior.
16. yoshimi battles the pink robots pt. 1 x the flaming lips.
17. love you madly x cake.
18. kate x ben folds.
19. don't listen to the radio x the vines.
20. the view x modest mouse.

01. we laugh at danger and break all the rules x against me!
02. cliche guevara x against me!
03. sadie x alkaline trio.
04. party hard x andrew w.k.
05. 94 hours x as i lay dying.
06. buses/no buses x bear vs. shark.
07. catamaran x bear vs. shark.
08. in other words x ben kweller.
09. relapsing x boysnightout.
10. the quiet things that no one ever knows x brand new.
11. at the bottom of everything x bright eyes.
12. train in vain (stand by me) x the clash.
13. the sound of settling x death cab for cutie.
14. apples and oranges x dogs die in hot cars.
15. rumors in town x the exploding hearts.
16. the first single (cause a scene) x the format.
17. sweet child o' mine x guns n' roses.
18. shimmy shimmy quarter turn x hellogoodbye.
19. kill x jimmy eat world.
20. since u been gone x kelly clarkson.
21. get low x lil' jon and the east side boys.
22. gamblin' man x limbeck.
23. hold me close x lucero.
24. absinthe party at the fly honey warehouse x minus the bear.
25. get me naked 2: electric boogaloo x minus the bear.
26. the devil's dick disaster x the number 12 looks like you.
27. long nights x piebald.
28. be still my heart x the postal service.
29. something bigger, something brighter x pretty girls make graves.
30. big choruses x recover.
31. spectacular views x rilo kiley.
32. cross my heart x the rocket summer.
33. this is me x the rocket summer.
34. brat pack x the rocket summer.
35. sell my old clothes, i'm off to heaven x saves the day.
36. alive with the glory of love x say anything.
37. slowly, through a vector x say anything.
38. chia-like, i shall grow x say anything.
39. wow, i can get sexual too x say anything.
40. a walk through hell x say anything.
41. panic x the smiths.
42. ask x the smiths.
43. bigmouth strikes again x the smiths.
44. there is a light that never goes out x the smiths.
45. drop it like it's hot x snoop dogg.
46. exhumation of virginia madison x strung out.
47. chicago x sufjan stevens.
48. shout x tears for fears.
49. atlantic x thrice.
50. red sky x thrice.
51. war all the time x thursday.
52. what it is ho? x trilville.
53. the city lights x umbrellas.
54. c'mon c'mon x the von bondies.
55. wake me up before you go go x wham!
56. highway to the danger zone x from the top gun soundtrack.

1. fists up x the blow.
2. romantic rights x death from above 1979.
3. amphetamine x everclear.
4. fall for you x tullycraft.
5. deceptacon x le tigre.
6. swimmers x broken social scene.
7. the clap x the unicorns.
8. cobrastyle x teddybears.
9. rise x you say party! we say die!
10. frenchy im faking (dat politics remix) x architecture in helsinki.
11. vampires in blue dresses x margot and the nuclear so & so's.
12. wolf like me x tv on the radio.
13. after all x sondre lerche.
14. huddle formation x the go! team.
15. with arms outstretched x rilo kiley.
16. digital love x daft punk.
17. young folks x peter, bjorn and john.
18. neighborhood #3 (power out) x the arcade fire.
19. let's make love and listen death from above x cansei de der sexy.
20. speakers push the air x pretty girls make graves.
21. light speed x matt and kim.
22. charm school x bishop allen.

*******
01. the sign x ace of base.
02. the future freaks me out x motion city soundtrack.
03. song for the dumped x ben folds five.
04. teenage dirtbag x wheatus.
05. plastic stars x freezepop.
06. saturday x the rocket summer.
07. mmmbop x hanson.
08. nintendo song x the capricorns.
09. switch x will smith.
10. hella nervous x gravy train!!!!
11. we like to party x venga boys.
12. i'm a thug x mike jones.
13. these words x natasha bedingfield.
14. beautiful life x ace of base.
15. dance, dance x fall out boy.
16. shake that laffy taffy x d4l.
17. the only difference between martyrdom and suicide is press coverage x panic! at the disco.
18. what's your fantasy? x ludacris.
19. spice up your life x spice girls.
20. pop princess x the click five.
21. goodnight and go x imogen heap.
********

Tue, 24 Feb 2009 06:43:51 GMT

my problem is you made me melt and i don't want to be frozen anymore, and to be completely honest, you're not like all the rest. so how does it feel to know you are everything i want? because no matter what i do from now on with my time, you will always stay here, in my mind. and there's a few things that i just need you to know, like the way i felt when we were close, and how the stars explode every time you are near. because i already know that nothing in the world would mean a single thing, until you are here with me and i have shared it with you. i am certain of this, and i am not certain of anything.

it's not in the words you told me. it's all in the way you looked at me, for the first time, everything felt right. thank you for making me see there's a life in me, it was dying to get out. you are the hope i have for change, and you are the only chance i'll take.

Mon, 09 Feb 2009 19:17:58 GMT

We're just a couple of kids, lost in February's kind grasp. Yeah it'll come and we'll go. Forever never seemed so close as when you put your hands in my pockets, and said "I'm quite fond of you kid, I think we'll be just fine. You keep the sky, and I'll settle for that look in your eyes."

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 02:33:02 GMT

I've got a big fat fucking bone to pick with you my darling: In case you haven't heard, I'm sick and tired of trying. Every time I scratch my nails down someone else's back, I hope you feel it. Well, do you feel it? Cause I left you in my memories, so if the train comes, lay down on the tracks and forget me, and how we used to kiss. I can't stand the person that you've grown to be. So dry your eyes and be on your way, as for me, I'll be okay.

Tue, 13 Jan 2009 03:52:07 GMT

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Fri, 02 Jan 2009 08:45:50 GMT

I'm learning to love myself, and it's the hardest thing I've ever done.

sorry for the ridiculous post. but no one reads this anyway

Wed, 31 Dec 2008 05:01:51 GMT

Dear No One,

Two Thousand and Eight will be over tomorrow night, and it seems like i've had quite a rollercoaster year. This year began with Brian on New Years, and ended without him, and as far as I'm concerned, that's the best for both of us. I graduated from High School, and actually became a college student. Salem State wasn't all that i expected, so i decided to transfer schools. After deciding THAT, i realized i truly have no idea what i want to do with the rest of my life, schoolwise, jobwise, livingwise, or anything else. All i know is that i feel more confident and independent than ever, and i think its time to start exploring my options. There's a few things i would like to remain constant in my life, like my very best friend, Kate, and a few other solid friendships that i've kept all this time, but as i see it, there's nothing holding me back from living out a dream that has yet to be determined. I know i want to explore the option of moving to Florida for atleast a semester, but quite recently i have discussed the option of taking this upcoming semester off. I feel like i need to do some real soul searching, and take some time for myself to really know what direction like to point my future.

Throughout the year, I've learned so much from life experiences i've had. The most important being what happened with Brian. I do admit i made plenty of mistakes when it came to him, but i feel like without doing so, i would have never realized or learned the lesson that came out of it. I can now see how hurtful my relationship with him was. I realized no matter how many times one person says they're sorry, or that they will change, neither is ever true. Saying sorry does not erase what happened in the past, its mearly a word used only when a person wants to be forgiven for what they've done, and recognize their actions, so it will never happen in the future. I've learned that just because someone uses the word "sorry" does not mean they will suddenly be aware of their mistakes. No one will change for you, they have to change on their own, and "i'm sorry" means nothing unless you have the actions to prove that. Brian also taught me i CAN have a meaningful relationship, and love someone with my whole heart, but he also showed me that i can walk away from someone that i care so much about, if they aren't treating me with respect (what ANYONE needs for a successful relationship). I realized i CAN live the single life without needing a boy to catch me if i fall. I've learned that i can even try to work with a person i onced cared about so much to create a relationship both of us can be happy in, but if it fails again, walking away because i don't need it anymore. it's amazing how dependent i became when i was with brian. And now that i can see life without someone that hibitually brought me down, i can feel happy and a new sense of freedom.

I've also learned that college is still going to be there next fall. I can make mistakes, and learn from them, and hopefully figure out what i truly want in the long run. I've figured out that it's best to live your life by your rules, and realize that just because it suits everyone else, doesn't mean it has to suit you. I want meaning and fulfilment out of this year, and to hopefully reach my goal of FINDING a goal.

My easy (kinda) New Years resolutions?
-Eat healthy and organically.
-Exercise regualarly, and maintain a healthy lifestyle throughout the year.
-Get a full-time job and SAVE.

Until 2009, LiveJournal. <3

this song explains my entire life. i love taytay.

Mon, 29 Dec 2008 19:26:07 GMT

I took a chance, I took a shot
And you might think i'm bulletproof, but i'm not
You took a swing, I took it hard
And down here from the ground I see who you are

I'm sick and tired of your attitude
I'm feeling like I don't know you
You tell me that you love me then you cut me down
And I need you like a heartbeat
But you know you got a mean streak
Makes me run for cover when you're around
And here's to you and your temper
Yes, I remember what you said last night
And I know that you see what you're doing to me Tell me why..

You could write a book on how to
ruin someone's perfect day
Well I get so confused and frustrated
Forget what i'm trying to say, oh

I'm sick and tired of your reasons
I got no one to believe in
You tell me that you want me, then push me around
And I need you like a heartbeat
But you know you got a mean streak
Makes me run for cover when you're around
Here's to you and your temper
Yes, I remember what you said last night
And I know that you see what you're doing to me Tell me why..

Why..do you have to make me feel small
So you can feel whole inside
Why..do you have to put down my dreams
So you're the only thing on my mind

I'm sick and tired of your attitude
I'm feeling like I don't know you
You tell me that you want me then cut me down
I'm sick and tired of your reasons
I've got no one to believe in
You ask me for my love then you push me around
Here's to you and your temper
Yes, I remember what you said last night
And I know that you see what you're doing to me Tell me why
Why, tell me why

I take a step back, let you go
I told you i'm not bulletproof Now you know

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 12:17:14 GMT

We're free spirits;
always running.
Nothing can hold us back,
why don't we run together?

Wed, 19 Nov 2008 23:34:23 GMT

We used to have this figured out;
We used to breathe without a doubt.
When nights were clear, you were the first star that I'd see.
We used to have this under control.
We never thought.
We used to know.
At least there's you, and at least there's me.
Can we get this back?
Can we get this back to how it used to be?

_______

Let the past be past
And let's start today.
Letters won't do,
I need to see your face.

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